Be Inspired

I'm beginning this week knowing that in a few days, I will sit with my doctor and discuss what we do next, which treatment do we try and then hope for the best that this one might work. I trust the Lord will give me guidance. But still, I know how easy it can be to feel overwhelmed by the responsibility of finding medical treatment for yourself when you have a condition that few doctors treat and many ostracize. People say 'you are your best advocate', but all too often, you are sadly your only advocate. And while opinions are changing in our favor in the medical community, it's still a battle to find and receive adequate treatment for Chronic Lyme Disease. So this post today is as much for me as anyone who chooses to read it; I too need to be inspired.

The clip below is from one of my all time favorite movies, Patch Adams. Based on a true story, the movie tells the story of a man who set out to change medicine from a biological model to a HUMAN model. I am inspired all over again each time I watch it- encouraged to always consider the entire person, reminded to laugh more, and challenged to see beyond the parameters that currently exist. The clip I've posted below is Patch's monologue when facing charges of practicing medicine without a license because he was welcoming people with no health insurance to come and receive free help and advice at his ranch. Watch...

Dr. Hunter Patch Adams dreamed of founding a free hospital, and later he would- the Gesundheit Institute. I know I often dream of what it would be like for there to be a place where Lyme patients could go for treatment- effective, holistic treatment- and I'm sure others of you do as well. And it's in the works. Mara Williams, author of Nature's Dirty Needle, is bringing this dream to reality at the Inanna House. I encourage you to look into what's building there, encourage their founders, and spread the word. And in the meantime... Cheer on the advocates and physicians who are passionate and compassionate. Pray that they may spread their knowledge and the fire within them amongst the rest of the medical field.

And you yourself, whether a Lyme patient or not, be inspired today.
Indifference, mediocrity and apathy, these are the greatest diseases of all.

With love--
Samantha

Weekend Inspiration

A song for the weekend. A song for life. Things will get brighter, even if they don't get better-- it's a matter of outlook, hope, and faith. And know that someday, on the other side of this life, things WILL be better. So look for and enjoy the days that are bright, but continue to have faith in the promise of the days that will be better.

Blessings, Love, and Health--
Samantha

Fighting the Good Fight

Some days it feels impossible, fighting. But every lymie, or person with any other chronic illness for that matter, knows that life is a 24/7 battle. I will take various medications and supplements at 10 separate intervals today- each planned out, some set to alarms so I wake up with enough time to space it out from another med, and I will still most likely forget at least one. I will decide what I have energy for, when to push myself and when to rest. I will spend more time than I would like to with heat packs nearby, and I will write down absolutely anything I need to remember, lest it be lost in my brain fogged head. This kind of life is a battle minute to minute and anyone would be naïve to think that it wouldn’t affect all the other areas of your self- mental, emotional, spiritual. So yes, it is a fight. But you are strong, stronger than you probably think you are.

You fight when you choose to keep living your life despite pain and when you take a deep breath and calmly explain to someone again what Lyme disease is. You show great wisdom when you choose to eat the foods that will best help your body and not just the easier ones that sound good. You are strong when you get up for another day, when you let yourself cry, when you reach out for help, and when you pull yourself up. You advocate for yourself when you go to yet another doctor appointment. You fight when you take your medicines, supplements, and homeopathic remedies. And hopefully on more occasions than not, you let go and submit, pray and recognize that the Lord is ultimately in control.

So be reminded today: You ARE strong, and you are NOT alone!

With Love--

Samantha

What Do I Say?

What do I say? Do I bring it up? Will that open an old wound, as if that's possible? Maybe she just wants space, time away to heal and 'get over it'. She looks good, so maybe it's not that bad. Yes, she's probably feeling much better.

How do you even begin to approach a friend, a family member, someone you care about with Lyme disease? It's a hard question to answer, but one that every one with Lyme desperately wishes to answer. We don't want to bore you with long, complicated explanations of the disease, and some days we may not even have the mental clarity to do so. It may be, as it turns out, that compassion and sympathy are more important than understanding.

An advocate and Lyme warrior herself, "Lyme Chick" writes and talks about this in her most recent blog post. Check it out. And as always, any questions and feedback are welcomed.

http://youtu.be/MJGsftN6pio

http://lymechick.com/2012/01/29/a-lyme-chicks-perspective-on-friendships/

Thank you for being my cheer squad, my prayer network, my friends, my family.

With Love--
Samantha

Remember Hope

I write this much overdue post after a day of remembering what healing felt like. Having woken up with a reasonable level of energy, I got ready for my day. I enjoyed a drive with the windows rolled down and the heat turned on (in Oregon, you have to enjoy the sunshine, even if it is a mere 45 degrees!). I went for a walk. Being the nanny for two active little ones, today I actually had the energy for a Nerf gun war, for being the “tickle monster”, for building forts, and for enjoying it all. Pain only consumed every second or third thought. I wrote out lists of all the ambitious projects I wanted to complete and dreamed about careers and travels. And I could dance the day out with Florence and the Machine. Today, I remembered what healing felt like.

Blogging is serious work; you know this if you’ve ever tried your hand at it. So after my last post and my new found health, I stopped blogging. There was simply too much living to do. The list was long of things I had waited for, and the days didn’t waste any seconds filling themselves up: coffee dates, helping friends plan weddings, celebrating at weddings (9 of them!), weekend getaways, bike rides and tennis playing, a new job, a family vacation, seeing dear friends off to faraway lands, time with my church family, and dreaming…oh, did I dream big dreams.

While blogging is hard, and I had much to do, I confess this: I have been afraid to update any of you on my life the last several months. About two and half months ago, Lyme disease (and all of its buddies- coinfections, etc.) has relapsed for an encore performance in my life. It’s a difficult thing to explain, or at least I thought it was. What I experienced seven months ago hasn’t changed, and my beliefs about it haven’t changed either. Remission is a challenging thing to attain with Chronic Lyme Disease (CLD), let alone a spontaneous remission and one in which ALL symptoms disappear. I maintained good health even after stopping all of my meds. The healing God did through the prayers of the elders at my church and by His Spirit was full, complete, and true. But healing is for the glory of God, not the glory of man. So I trust now also that my experience in being healed was used for the glory of God and will continue to be and that my current circumstances will also be used to show me, and those around me, more about our almighty, sovereign, just, and loving Lord. James chapter 5, verses 13 through 16 tells us to call the elders of the church and pray for healing. But then verses 17 and 18 say this,

“17. Elijah was a man just like us. He prayed earnestly that it would not rain, and it did not rain on the land for three and a half years. 18. Again he prayed, and the heavens gave rain, and the earth produced its crops.”

Again, it says. Again Elijah prayed. And so I will continue to pray once more for healing in my own story. I am still uncertain the purpose for this recent relapse in health, but as I remembered today, there is no reason for sadness. I was blessed with nearly 5 months of full health and enjoyed it thoroughly. I was able to do things I hadn’t dreamed I would do this summer. But more importantly, I learned so much about the God I know, who never fails to keep His promises. He taught me how to dream with wild abandon and find hope in the one who IS hope. I may have stopped blogging, but I didn’t stop writing and there is a heap of learning I’ve done and would love to share with you all.

Simply remember today that hope is not found in circumstances and dreams; it is found in Christ.

Thank you for your ongoing support and friendship, love and prayers.

~Samantha

“…but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.” –Romans 5:3-5